Forgetting to Remember

He sat on his bed, back against the wall with a pillow in between his crossed legs.
Arms wrapped around the pillow, nose and mouth buried in pillow.

But his green eyes set on the hot screen of the laptop in front of him.

No programs open, just a picture.

He wasn't talking to anyone.
He wasn't doing anything,

Just sitting there and staring at the picture.

The picture of him and his love.



She sat on her bed, back against the wall with a pillow in between her crossed legs.
Arms wrapped around the pillow, nose and mouth buried in pillow.

But her green eyes set on the hot screen of the laptop in front of her.

No programs open, just a picture.

She wasn't talking to anyone.
She wasn't doing anything,

Just sitting there and staring at the picture.

The picture of her and her love.



They both wondered if the other was thinking about them.

When they talked, each would appear to not feel anything more than friendship for the other person.

But they were both proficient with fooling other people.

The only time there was an easily noticeable connection was when they stared deep into each other's eyes the first day they met.

But they were both proficient at lying to other people.

They wanted to be together but they didn't know what the other knew.

Because they were both proficient at decieving other people.


As they stared at their screens, neither wondered if it was actually themselves who they were fooling.
Themselves that they were lying to.
Themselves that they were decieving.


He reached out towards his laptop.
She reached out towards her laptop.

And with the back of his finger, gently traced the shape of her face,
And with the back of her finger, gently traced the shape of his face,

from the left side of her forehead, to her chin.
from the left side of his forehead, to his chin.

As a tear rolled down his cheek, he lowered his eyes into his pillow.
As a tear rolled down her cheek, she lowered her eyes into her pillow.

He pulled his hand back halfway to his pillow, then hesitated.
She pulled her hand back halfway to her pillow, then hesitated.

He opened his hand and moved it towards the center of his screen, but hovered just before touching it.
She opened her hand and moved it towards the center of her screen, but hovered just before touching it.

He touched the screen.
She touched the screen.

The middle of his screen turned into the shape of a hand and its fingers wrapped around his.
The middle of her screen turned into the shape of a hand and its fingers wrapped around hers.

He knew it was her hand. He pulled the hand, to try to pull her back into his life.
She knew it was his hand. She pulled the hand, to try to pull him back into her life.

Instead the hand pulled them into the screen.

They appeared in front of each other.

Floating in an area that looks like endless white.

Each wearing white.

The feeling of purity was abundant in this place.

Behind each of them was their computer screen.

Like a window that they climbed through.

They looked deep into each others green eyes, just as they did that first day, but this time, their eyes slowly closed.

As they moved closer to each other, their eyes closed more and more.

Their eyes shut completely, the moment that their lips met.

They kissed gently, then slowly opened their eyes as their lips parted.

The screens behind them started to project powerful colours onto each, as the colour of the screens poluted the purity.

They started to fade as the screens pulled them back, but the entire time, neither was remotely disturbed by the occurences.

They maintained eye contact without blinking.

Their eyes were filled with sorrow as they were to part again.

But their hearts grew strong from the happiness they recieved.

He reached out with his right hand as she reached out with her left.

They slowly faded.

Their hands got closer.

They were almost completely faded.

Their fingertips where a hairs width away, when they completely faded.





He wakes up on the right side of his bed, facing the left.
She wakes up on the left side of her bed, facing the right.

It was just a dream..
It was just a dream..

Chau <3

A true point of view

"To reconstitute political life in a state presupposes a good man, whereas to have recourse to violence in order to make oneself prince in a republic supposes a bad man. Hence very rarely will there be found a good man ready to use bad methods in order to make himself prince, though with a good end in view.

Nor will any reasonable man blame him for taking any action, however extraordinary, which may be of service in the organizing of a kingdom or the constituting of a republic. It is a sound maxim that reprehensible actions may be justified by their effects, and that when the effect is good, it always justifies the action. For it is the man who uses violence to spoil things, not the man who uses it to mend them, that is blameworthy.

A Prince should therefore disregard the reproach of being thought cruel where it enables him to keep his subjects united and loyal. For he who quells disorder by a very few signal examples will in the end be more merciful than he who from too great leniency permits things to take their course and so result in chaos and bloodshed; for these hurt the whole state, whereas the severities of the Prince injure individuals only.

It is essential therefore, for a Prince who desires to maintain his position, to have learned how to be other than good, and to use or not use his goodness as necessity requires."

"Everyone sees what you seem to be, but few know what you are."

Chau <3

Ta bueno.

I'm going to make a new blog, I'm keeping this one but the other one is going to me more private

I feel I have too many readers on this one.

I'm still going to write in this one, don't get me wrong, but the other one is going to be my own venting thing

In spanish.

So yeah...

Chau <3

Revenge

Revenge is like a ghost.
It takes over every man it touches.
It's thirst will never be quenched,
Until the last man standing has fallen.
You may be able to destroy me,
But the beast will eventually come for you.

Chau <3

You disgust me.

The words repeated to me by a little boy I've never met before.
My whole outlook on myself just got reinforced with that statement.

I disgusted myself.
I was actually quite surprised at how many People accepted me for who I am when I can't even accept myself.

You disgust me.
The words I thought to myself every time I broke a girls heart.

Seems that I've started to show it.
Good.

People can see who I really am and I'll get treated as I deserve.
It is only fair. I talk about treating people equally and fairly.

Why should I be the same?
I've done a lot of fucked up things.

Sergio,
You disgust me.


Chau <3

:D

I just realized that 8 days ago was this blogs first birthday! :)

So, happy birthday blog!

You've been with me through my bad times,
my good times,
my awesome times,
and my fucked up times haha :P
I'll try to whine a little less and start talking about more positive things from now on haha :P

News-
I'm moving to Brisbane in 4 months,
Already bought the apartment,
Just need to move in :)

It's in a good town, near a beach and stuff :P
Any pretty girl want to come?

Anyone? lol

Damn. :P

Anyways again happy birthday to my blog and peace out my niggas :)

Chau <3

Living the dream? Or dreaming the nightmare?

Walking through the train station confused about what platform I should go to.

Platform Attendant.

Bingo.

I show him my pass and ask, "Sorry, where is this platform?"
As he points to his left i thank him and follow the direction of his finger.

I start walking towards the platform and i walk through a small maze of poles that were set up to guide traffic of people when it's busy. Only one guy in front of me walking through the maze. I notice some guys on the platform that seem dodgy so i slow down a little bit. One of them pulls out a gun slowly and the rest follow suit.

They point it at my direction and all i can think of is "Shit."
I try to play it cool and look at my ticket, as I stop i try to make it look like i was walking towards the wrong platform so i start to walk back the other way. I don't walk too fast because i know that they'll notice me and shoot me straight away. With the men with guns on my left I leave the small maze and start making my way to a short but tall passageway about 30 meters in front of me.

I hear a silenced handgun shot and a groan. A thump follows and i know that the guy that was walking in front of me before is now dead. I try to play it cool like i didn't hear anything and i start hearing more silenced rounds go off. The bullets are hitting everything to the direction they were pointing at except me.

I hear one go past my head but continue to ignore the actions around me. About 10 meters to the tunnel.
I continue my pace and pray that i don't get shot.

The guns stop shooting.

Footsteps running follow. Sounds like 3 men after me. 5 meters to the tunnel.
3 meters
1 meter

I turn into the corner and instantly drop my bag and start running for my life.
I follow the corridor the only way it goes.

Right

Left

Left

Right

Left

The footsteps are getting closer.

I see an exit sign and two doors to either side of it. the sign doesn't say which door but i know that if i take the wrong one ill be trapped. I take the door at the right. I get through and close the door behind me.

I turn around and see an old shabby apartment.

Wrong door.

Footsteps getting closer.

Too late.

I run into the apartment and run up the stairs. I run into the closest room.

Bathroom. Damn, i just can't catch a break.

Smallest bathroom i've ever seen. 1 m to both sides. Only room for a sink and the small 30 by 30 cm window behind it. All the lemon and cream coloured wallpaper is coming off, although it looks like it was kind of torn off. Everything is rusty and covered in grime, and the light is so bad that all it does is add to the crappiness of the room. I hear footsteps coming up the stairs. Shit.

I open the tap and splash some water on my face to try to help me cool down a little bit. I look up to the window and realise that the only thing behind it is cardboard and wood.

Suddenly blood starts dripping through the bottom of the window. Soon it starts flowing. I realise that the suppossed water that i had my hands under the whole time turned to blood. It spilled everywhere and covered me in it.

Suddenly the footsteps stop and a loud bang is heard from the door. Another loud bang. Another follows. It continues.

Then the last loud bang is the loudest of all. Splinters fly everywhere and the door comes crashing down at me.

Just before the door hits me, a blinding flash of white light appears and i wake up in a patch of grass.

I shift up on my elbows and realise that im in a large garden. Suddenly Edward from twilight walks in front of me wearing what looks to be like an englishman/golfers clothes. cream coloured suit pants. stripy bright shirt. yellow jumper draped over his shoulders with the arms tied in front of him.

He steps closer to me and puts his face about 40 cm's away from mine. Then his face suddenly splits into 3 with his skull one piece and the jaw spliting into two, and he roars at me with all his might. His face turns back to normal as he stands up looking pleased with himself.

I have a feeling that this is a dream so while still down I kick him straight in the testicles. Just as he bend over holding his prized jewels, the fearless warrior awakes from his slumber.

Chau <3