Friday, March 1, 2013

Seasons of change

Spring is born. Bright. Refreshing. Full of hope.

He grew and obtained information every second of the day
Learn to talk
Learn to walk
Learn to learn

Confusion occurs.
What is this?
They are yelling.
Is this fighting?

No.

Don't hurt her.. please..

Don't ask questions?
My room.. I'll go to it.

High school comes along and the same feeling of popularity he had, is gone.
A scarcity of people surrounding him is new.
Too new.

Have to adapt..
How?

Try to make friends.

I don't know these people. I can not make friends here. I will sit in the background and keep my mouth shut.


Years progress and it comes to late high school.
Popularity growing by the second. I know these people. I am friends with a lot of them. I will try to stand out.

Make a fool of myself. Once. Twice. Three times. They are over the stage of thinking I'm weird to the stage of just thinking I'm a fool. Perfect.





Summer comes along. Warm. Fierce. Strong. Confident.

He grew and obtained information every second of the day
Learn to talk to people properly
Learn to manipulate
Learn to get what you want

Virgin? Goodbye.
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.

He used to remember the order and names of every girl he slept with.
He started to forget the order.
He progressed to forget names.
He continued and lost count of the number.

Who am I now?
I've built myself up to be this.. This machine.
A perfect machine that knows what he wants and how to get it and he will get it regardless because of manipulation.
I've become this machine and now. Who am I?
Where am I?


Why am I.



Years pass and he settles down. He becomes a little less machine and a bit more him again. Now that he has what he wanted, there is no need to continue that facade so blending the two in slowly will do.

Problem.

Family starts to move.

One by one moving away from the area. From his friends. From what he knows.

Problem.

Family member needs him. No choice.
Must leave.




Autumn comes along. Slow. Painful. Sad. Dull.


Goodbye friends, everyone means the world to me and I will miss every second of the day spent with all of you.

No reply.
Why?
No one cares.
Goodbye.


Sadness occurs.
Loneliness ensues.
Depression follows.

He grew and obtained information every second of the day
Learn you can't trust anyone
Learn you have to do on your own
Learn how to deal with depression
Learn you will always be alone

Worse.

Worse.

Every day.

More things happen.

More depression responds.




Winter comes along. Cold. Dead. Unwilling.

Learn?
Learn nothing.

Nothing.

Cold.

Dead.



Girl comes in.

He changes slowly.

Winter turns to Autumn.
Autumn turns to Summer.


Spring is born.

He learns.
You are not alone.
You are happy.
You have everything you've ever wanted.
And there is nothing material that will ever change your mind.

Take care of Spring.


Chau <3

7 comments:

  1. Take care of Spring. Even without Spring, you are not alone, you're not dead or forgotten.

    You mean something to people and you need to always remember even if they don't show it to you properly, or even if they don't appreciate you properly. In the end, people do love you, and do care and think about you.

    No one will truly leave you. They'll be there for you when you need them.

    ReplyDelete
  2. i feel your pain. am having a reflective momen atm.

    ReplyDelete